“Where’s Johnny?” Review
Grade: A
“A Trip Down Memory Lane.”
The Sopranos has the power to make us laugh, make us frightened and make us ponder the nature of human existence. But rarely does The Sopranos make us cry. Until “Where’s Johnny?” that is. The third episode of season five closes with a heartbreaking final scene, as we watch dementia take its toll on Uncle Junior in real time. He and Tony Soprano silently reminisce about their lives, their relationship and their remaining moments together while watching a nature documentary in the living room.
“Don’t you love me?” Tony asks. All Uncle Junior can do is sit there on the couch as tears run down his face.
The final scene might not exactly evoke the same reaction (i.e., crying is not required), but the emotions are perfectly conveyed. It’s an expertly crafted sequence that is both poignant and painful. There’s so much history between the two characters (much of it built up over the series, but even more stemming from before the series began) that dialogue isn’t even necessary. It’s a genuine display of family tragedy filled with love, fear and sorrow.
Even when all context is removed, the scene is one of The Sopranos’ best. But to fully understand how we end up at such a tearjerking juncture, we — like Uncle Junior — must move backward.
Midway through “Where’s Johnny?” Junior gets lost in downtown Newark, roaming through the neighborhood wearing slippers and a bathrobe, searching for his long dead brother Johnny Boy. Together they used to run this town, but now time has passed everything by — including the old town itself.
Director John Patterson does a great job making Junior’s confusion palpable, and his surreal trip down memory lane is propped up with dissolves and Dutch angles. We can literally see his disorientation. Then again, the camerawork is countered with some of the more hyper-realistic settings The Sopranos has ever shown — the proud Italian neighborhood Junior once knew is replaced by gritty ghettos and urban decay.
Even in his delirium, Junior longs for the old days now gone. And Tony, too, pines for the memories of when his uncle taught him to play baseball as a child, or even the time when he lovingly carried Junior to the hospital after he broke his hip. Instead, he’s reminded only of their past feuds and power struggles (“Your father never had the makings of a varsity athlete” and “I’m still the boss of this family” are repeated several times by Junior). That unspoken nostalgia is what makes the final scene so powerful, and why a single question of “Don’t you love me?” can bring all the memories flooding back.
We’ve spent the last four years with Tony and Uncle Junior, but it feels like we’ve known them all our lives. In a sense, this reflects television’s greatest advantage as an art form — the unique ability to manipulate time. It’s like one of our own family members is suffering dementia, and knowing that their condition can’t be changed, all we can do is relive the memories we’ve already shared.
Elsewhere, “Where’s Johnny?” stays focused on the present. The war over who will take over as head of the Lupertazzi crime family is heating up, as Johnny Sack’s henchman Phil Leotardo pays a violent visit to Lorraine Calluzzo (both were introduced this season). Even though the scene bristles with a Tarantino-like intensity, Lorraine is simply an uninteresting and unlikable character. She’s racist, too cocksure (in more ways than one) and out of place. As backward as it sounds, a woman gangster doesn’t fit the Soprano aesthetic and her inclusion is the only flaw in an otherwise masterful installment.
Nevertheless, the addition of new characters signify that change is on the horizon in the crime landscape. Phil’s mock execution is much more ruthless than what we’re used to, and Tony’s meager standing when it comes to New York City is a dynamic we haven’t seen. In a way, the stakes have been raised exponentially, which also seems a bit strange for The Sopranos. It’s always been a show about the Donnie Brascos rather than the Vito Corleones.
Thankfully, a casual storyline about a turf war over landscaping contracts between Paulie Gualtieri and Feech La Manna gets us back to the inconsequential gangland squabbles we know and love. Everything involving Paulie these days is pure comedy (“He jumped out the tree and came at me with a chainsaw”), even when he’s trying to use his Mafia influence for good. Sure, Sal Vitro the landscaper gets his old neighborhood back, but he also gets a broken arm and is forced to mow Johnny Sack’s lawn for free. It’s a hilarious parable of self-righteousness leading to selfishness, which is what The Sopranos specializes in.
The multi-layered “Where’s Johnny?” also gives us our annual blow-up argument between Tony and sister Janice. This time, the shouting match leads to Homer Simpson-style strangling, which is a new low even for the most dysfunctional family in New Jersey. And although the quarrel might garner an ill-mannered snicker, it’s also an unpleasant reminder that Tony takes after his mother more than anyone else. He gets joy out of sabotaging Janice’s new family.
“Where’s Johnny?” is a busy episode indeed, but that magnificent final scene transcends everything else that takes place, encapsulating everything The Sopranos has to say about family in one memorable sequence.
Tony just wants to be loved unconditionally, like a child, and he even seeks affection from the same man who tried to have him killed back in season one. “Don’t you love me?” is perhaps the most innocent thing he’s ever said. Junior, meanwhile, is unable to communicate. He doesn’t answer the question and instead tries to distract himself by fixating on the TV. All he can do is cry.
And for once, series creator David Chase chooses not to manipulate our emotions. Everything is taken at face value, and the new age ambient music that plays over the end credits carries no connotations. All the emotions in the scene are genuine, and it’s perhaps the only time we can truly empathize with any of the characters.
All this makes “Where’s Johnny?” a great episode that delivers on all levels: emotional, intellectual and artful. It’s been a little while since the series delivered a standalone classic, and it’s heartening to see The Sopranos return to its episodic roots.
STRAY ROUNDS
- We find out that Tony was originally supposed to accompany his cousin Tony Blundetto on the hijacking that put him in prison. Instead, Tony was jumped by unidentified black males and spent the night in the hospital. It’s another Soprano family relationship built on guilt and regret.
- Can’t help but laugh at Uncle Junior watching an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm and thinking he is Larry David and Bobby Baccalieri is Jeff Garlin.
- Tony narrated in the pilot episode that Junior once told the girl cousins he never had the makings of a varsity athlete, which was a huge blow to his self-esteem. Now that we know all about Tony’s fragile ego, it’s fair to assume that this throwaway insult shaped the entirety of his childhood, which is why he freaks out when Junior keeps repeating it in “Where’s Johnny?”
- Tony and Artie Bucco make amends over last season’s loan debacle/attempted suicide, and Tony invites Artie to stay with him at his mother’s (Artie is also somewhat estranged from his wife). Artie accepts the invitation, but unfortunately receives a stray elbow to the face during Tony and Janice’s argument. And, of course, Tony also uses the new living arrangement to get Tony B a job washing the linens in Artie’s restaurant.
- In a bit of fan service, Adriana explains the confusing Soprano family tree to her FBI handler: Carmela is first cousins with Dicke Moltisanti (Christopher’s father), which is why Tony calls Chris his nephew, but Tony is also cousins with Joann Blundetto (Christopher’s mother) going all the way back to the old country, which means Tony and Chris are technically cousins.
- Tony proposes that Johnny Sack, Carmine Jr. and semi-retired capo Angelo Garepe (another new character) form a triumvirate, an idea which Johnny immediately rejects. In typical hilarious fashion, Johnny shouts the last half of his sentence: “What is this, THE F**KING U.N. NOW?!”
- Tony brings Chris to a meeting with Johnny Sack and tells him not to mention the feud. Of course, the first thing Chris does is talk about the feud, which causes Johnny to immediately storm out. I had been willing to give Chris the benefit of the doubt the last few years due to his drug addiction, but now that he’s clean and sober, it’s clear that he’s just an idiot. If given the chance, he’d probably drown in three inches of water.
- “Where’s Johnny?” was written by Michael Caleo and directed by John Patterson.
FAMOUS LAST WORDS
- “I got 16 stitches. You got 15 years.”
- “How about I f**k off all over your stupid f**king face!”
- “Next time there’ll be no next time.”
- “Your father never had the makings of a varsity athlete.”
- “Now I gotta un-f**k what you just f**ked up.”
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